Hilarious Song! No questions asked! I put the lyrics in too if you sing. e|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------|| B|-10--10--10--10--|-10--10--10--10--|--9--9--9----9--9--9----9--9---||0 G|--9---9---9---9--|--9---9---9---9--|--9--9--9----9--9--9----9--9---|| D|--7---7---7---7--|--7---7---7---7--|--7--7--7----9--9--9----7--7---|| x4 A|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------||0 E|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------|| Then, you just hold the A5 chord after the fourth time. 1. She told me she was running late as she headed out the door.~ 2. I heard the sound of lightning as the rain began to pour.~ e|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------|| B|-----9-----|-----7-----|-----7----|-----5-----||0 G|-----8-----|-----6-----|-----7----|-----4-----|| D|-----6-----|-----4-----|-----4----|-----2-----|| x2 A|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------||0 E|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------|| 3. When she got to work her hands were wet, But she didn't have time to dry.~ e|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------|| B|-----9-----|-----7-----|-----8----|-----5--5--|| G|-----8-----|-----6-----|-----7----|-----4--4--|| D|-----6-----|-----4-----|-----5----|-----2--2--|| A|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------|| E|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------|| 4. Her clear heels slipped on fifty cents, When she heard somebody cry! (Chorus) e|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------|| B|-10--10--10--10--|-10--10--10--10--|--9--9--9----9--9--9----9--9---||0 G|--9---9---9---9--|--9---9---9---9--|--9--9--9----9--9--9----9--9---|| D|--7---7---7---7--|--7---7---7---7--|--7--7--7----9--9--9----7--7---|| x2 A|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------||0 E|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------|| 1.Stripper pole accident! 2.She woke up inside an am-bu-lance.~ e|-------------|------------|------------|------------| B|--7--7--7--7-|-7--7--7--7-|-9--9--9--9-|-9--9--9--9-| G|--6--6--6--6-|-6--6--6--6-|-8--8--8--8-|-8--8--8--8-| D|--4--4--4--4-|-4--4--4--4-|-6--6--6--6-|-6--6--6--6-| A|-------------|------------|------------|------------| E|-------------|------------|------------|------------| 3.Crack her skull and broke her nose! 4.Now she'll never feel her toes! e|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------|| B|-10--10--10--10--|-10--10--10--10--|--9--9--9----9--9--9----9--9---|| G|--9---9---9---9--|--9---9---9---9--|--9--9--9----9--9--9----9--9---|| D|--7---7---7---7--|--7---7---7---7--|--7--7--7----9--9--9----7--7---|| A|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------|| E|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------|| Stripper pole ac-ciden-t! you then play this twice. e|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------|| B|-10--10--10--10--|-10--10--10--10--|--9--9--9----9--9--9----9--9---||0 G|--9---9---9---9--|--9---9---9---9--|--9--9--9----9--9--9----9--9---|| D|--7---7---7---7--|--7---7---7---7--|--7--7--7----9--9--9----7--7---|| x2 A|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------||0 E|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------|| e|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------|| B|-10--10--10--10--|-10--10--10--10--|--9--9--9----9--9--9----9--9---||0 G|--9---9---9---9--|--9---9---9---9--|--9--9--9----9--9--9----9--9---|| D|--7---7---7---7--|--7---7---7---7--|--7--7--7----9--9--9----7--7---|| x3 A|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------||0 E|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------|| 1. I was watching cheaters, 2. when I first heard the news.~ 3. As soon as it was over, e|-------------|------------|------------|------------|| B|--7--7--7--7-|-7--7--7--7-|-5--5--5--5-|-5--5--5--5-|| G|--6--6--6--6-|-6--6--6--6-|-4--4--4--4-|-4--4--4--4-|| D|--4--4--4--4-|-4--4--4--4-|-2--2--2--2-|-2--2--2--2-|| A|-------------|------------|------------|------------|| E|-------------|------------|------------|------------|| 4. I tried to find my shows.~ e|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------|| B|-----9-----|-----7-----|-----7----|-----5-----||0 G|-----8-----|-----6-----|-----7----|-----4-----|| D|-----6-----|-----4-----|-----4----|-----2-----|| x2 A|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------||0 E|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------|| 1.When the doctor told me that, 2. She'd never walk again.~ e|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------|| B|-----9-----|-----7-----|-----8----|-----5--5--|| G|-----8-----|-----6-----|-----7----|-----4--4--|| D|-----6-----|-----4-----|-----5----|-----2--2--|| A|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------|| E|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------|| 3. I looked into her 2 black eyes and said 4."Who's gonna pay the rent?!" e|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------|| B|-10--10--10--10--|-10--10--10--10--|--9--9--9----9--9--9----9--9---||0 G|--9---9---9---9--|--9---9---9---9--|--9--9--9----9--9--9----9--9---|| D|--7---7---7---7--|--7---7---7---7--|--7--7--7----9--9--9----7--7---|| x3 A|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------||0 E|-----------------|-----------------|-------------------------------|| 1. Stripper pole ac-cident! 2.Her second vertebrate is broke and bent. e|-------------|------------|------------|------------| B|--7--7--7--7-|-7--7--7--7-|-9--9--9--9-|-9--9--9--9-| G|--6--6--6--6-|-6--6--6--6-|-8--8--8--8-|-8--8--8--8-| D|--4--4--4--4-|-4--4--4--4-|-6--6--6--6-|-6--6--6--6-| A|-------------|------------|------------|------------| E|-------------|------------|------------|------------| 3. If she can't squat on someones knob, 4. Then I'll have to get a job! e|-----------|-----------| B|---8---7-7-|---5-------| G|---7---7-7-|---4-------| D|---5---5-5-|---2-------| A|-----------|-----------| E|-----------|-----------| Stripper pole ac-ciden-t! e|-----------|-----------|----------|----------|| B|-----8-----|-----7-----|-----5----|-----7----|| G|-----7-----|-----6-----|-----4----|-----6----|| D|-----5-----|-----4-----|-----2----|-----4----|| A|-----------|-----------|----------|----------|| E|-----------|-----------|----------|----------|| 1.She sued and got her job back, 2. But she can't shake her dead ass. e|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------|| B|-----8-----|-----7-----|-----9----|-----11----|| G|-----7-----|-----6-----|-----8----|-----10----|| D|-----5-----|-----4-----|-----6----|-----8-----|| A|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------|| E|-----------|-----------|----------|-----------|| !SOLO! *its all double tones e|--------------------------------------------------------------------------| B|--/7~--7/12--12\7--5--8~--7-8-7-8-7-5--6~--5-6-5-6-5-3--8b=10=8~--5b=7=5~-| G|--/8~--8/11--11\8--5--9~--8-9-8-9-8-6--7~--6-7-6-7-6-4--------------------| D|--------------------------------------------------------------------------| A|--------------------------------------------------------------------------| E|--------------------------------------------------------------------------| i like to end he solo with a pinch harmonic on B. e|------ B|--<12> G|------ D|------ A|------ E|------ And all the rest are repeats, and I don't feel like doin' um. Well, that's my tab. hope you like it cus im sure its right.