Half man half biscuit
restless legs
Here she lies in the fleecy gown
by my side in the eiderdown
but she can't get a ticket to morning town
cause I have restless legs
Boring though this film may be
Slumber still won't visit thee
so long as you stay next to me
for I have restless legs
Milky drink and sudafed
that should sort you out she said
as I kicked myself clean out of the bed
praise these restless legs
Homeopathic cures I sort
all in all its come to nought
I wish it was some astronaut
who had these restless legs
4 o 6 and I’m wide awake
and uncontrollable urge to take
a 5 mile hike around the Ogwen Lake
just to stretch these restless legs
No sympathy from Uncle Greg
nor indeed from Aunty Meg
but thank god I’m not Jake the peg
with a extra restless leg
So come the day when I don’t exist
And worms are flying through the graveyard mist
don’t go botherin' the exorcist
its just my restless legs
its just my restless legs