Tripod - Army Recruitment Song
Am(palm muted. Got that same beat as on the real adds)
Spoken:
Joining today's modern defense force is hard enough. First you have to choose:
Navy, Airfoce, Army, Kiss Army, Salvation Army, Army of Darkness, but even when
you've chosen, you have to make the grade.
(All chords palm muted for first verse)
Verse:
I'm way too skinny for the Army?
Way too slender for the job?
What can I do if my country doesn't want me cause
My talents only stretch to mini golf?
I'm way too uncool for the Army
All that running through car tyres
I guess that would come in handy if you invaded
A country whose terrain was all car tyres.
Chorus:(clean)
But I'm skinny and unclever
Maybe now more than ever
The technology has caught up with me
If wars have gone all electronic
I could fight them with my joystick
As long as they bring pizza to me
Then I could be in the Army.
Verse 2:
It's not tricky to imagine
Me in a bunker at a screen
Controlling reconaisance robots
Maybe mine detecting robots
Even robots who run through tyres
Chorus:
But I'm skinny and unclever
Maybe now more than ever
The technology has caught up with me
If wars have gone all electronic
I could fight them with my joystick
While watching McLeod's Daughters on TV
Then I could be in the Army.
Verse 3:
I was never good at Pacman
But at Defender I'd light up the skies
I was never good at Frogger
It's much to much like hopping all the tyres
And if I don't get in the Army
I could become an evil mastermind
Live in an underwater tower
And wearing shiny skivvies all the time
That would be fine
Chorus:
Skinny and unclever
Maybe now more than ever
The technology has caught up with me, (If I could make up my mind)
If wars have gone all electronic
I could fight them with my joystick
As long as they bring pizza to me
Then I could be in the Army____.