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My Little Secret Tab

by Bo Burnham


Bo Burnham
My "Little" Secret


Intro
 
                    


                                    
People think im tall, you probably do too,
                                             
Cause i got a big hat size and a 16 shoe.
                                            
As tall as a tree, but as wide as a twig,
                                       
To top it all off, my weener is a...tiny
                                    
It doesnt make any sense, its only 2 1/2
                                       
Whenever i'm naked even asians laugh (sry)
                               
It'll be like nothing youve ever felt
                                            
Im the only guy who needs a condom belt...(what?)


       


                                    
Please dont be mean, please dont be a jerk
                                                    
Ive tried all those pills trust me they dont work.
                                      
If girth was a virtue, I'd end up in hell,
                                               
Right now I'm erect, and you can't even tell.
                          
I hate myself, Why isnt it long?
                                         
Did my circumcision go horribly wrong?
                                       
When my girlfriend saw it she started to sob,
                                     
"I can only give you a finger-job"


      


                                 
I wanna be the stud, now i'm the stooge.
                                                   
It wouldn't be wierd, if my balls weren't so huge.
                                            
I guess it would be great if i was hung like a horse,
                                         
But i gotta let nature take its course...
                  
just kidding im huge.