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Roadkill Christmas Tab

by Jeff Dunham


Roadkill Christmas

Intro: -  - 

Verse 1:
                      
Got my dog and 6-pack inside my truck 
                                   
My wife rides in the back because she won't shut up 
                                       
There's a deer in the headlights and though it might be a sin 
      	                       
I gunned the motor and run over him 

Chorus 1:
                   
It's a Roadkill Christmas 
              
Venison pretenderized 
            	        
It's a Roadkill Christmas 
              	                    
'Cause they freeze when the lights hit their eyes 

Verse 2:
(do verse chords)
She loaded him into the back of the truck 
I was driving us home, that's when he done woke up 
I couldn't believe what I saw in my rear-view mirror 
My wife was a-wrestlin' with a mad deer 

Chorus 2:
(do chorus chords)
It's a Roadkill Christmas 
She had fifty pounds over him 
It's a Roadkill Christmas 
It was no time 'til she had him pinned 

Verse 3:
(do verse chords)
By the time we got home, he was her pet 
That night, he slept on my side of the bed 
I had to spend the night out in my truck 
But I had some beer, so I didn't give a... darn 

*JEFF: Bubba J, that was close.* 
*Bubba J: Yeah I know, I almost said damn.* 

Verse 4:
(do verse chords)
A couple days later, I made him a deal 
If he worked for me, then he would not be my next meal 
I covered his antlers with foil and then, 
I plugged the T.V. cable into his rear end 

Chorus 3:
(do chorus chords)
It's a Roadkill Christmas 
Every Sunday, he's up on my roof 
It's a Roadkill Christmas 
I get NASCAR and the NFL, too. 

Chorus 4:
(do chorus chords)
It's a Roadkill Christmas 
That dumb deer changed my life 
It's a Roadkill Christmas 
Next time, I'll run over my wife!

Outro: --