Down to the Old Pub Instead
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
by Stephen Lynch
from ^ÓSuperhero^Ô (2002)
Got this from another site, but the words were incomplete so i filled in the
gaps...really good song! another irish classic lol! sorry the formattings a bit
screwed but thats how i found it. Credit to: Jon Cutright
not me!
INTRO:
^Ö - ^Ö
VERSE 1:
Lad it^Òs your duty to find you a lass
with child-bearing hips and a pink supple ass
And make her you wife and love her with love so true
Now, some rivers run high some rivers run low
When her river runs red then she starting her flow
And it^Òs called menstruation and heres what I means to you
You will notice her bloomers are spartie? At first
Stand back, her ovarian dams gonna burst
So don^Òt be afraid it’s a natural thing
Just wind up some cotton and give her some string
Put the old linens on top of the bed
get out of the house and go down to the old pub
instead.
VERSE 2:
She^Òll retain her water her breasts will be tender
And every third word that you say will offend her
Get out of the house and go down to the old pub instead
And she^Òll want to make love if you do you’re a fool
Cause you^Òll only end up with a bloody ol’ tool
Get out of the house, down to the old pub instead
And she^Òll want you to sample the fruit of her loins
But son it^Òll taste like some old rusty coins
So turn off the lights boy and take off your hat
And drop to your knees say a prayer to st pat
Then he^Òll give you the strength to get out of the bed
And for Ireland^Òs sake go down to the old pub
instead.
VERSE 3:
Now the pub is the place where the lads are a meeting
When the moon^Òs full and the girls are a bleatin
The catholic, the protestant even the pagan
The pub is the place when lady is raggin
So drink of your pint boys and thank your shamrocks
That as men folk we don^Òt have to bleed from our cocks
And that we can escape from the lady in red
And get out of the house and go down to the old pub
e]------------3---
B]----------3-----
G]--------0-------
D]------0---------
A]----2-----------
E]--3-------------
instead.